Chapter 4 - Hopelessness

Ever since that incident with my father and the scary old man, I have been trying to reproduce what my father did with my hand. But no matter what I do, I can’t replicate it. I feel like something crucial is missing. That’s when I remembered the energy I felt inside my body…

If my theory is correct, that pale yellow light my father had on his hand is that energy. But how did he do it? When I started concentrating on that energy, I felt the same type of energy around me. I tried to pull it into my body. It moved toward me at an almost snail’s pace.

I concentrated hard, imagining myself as a pool where the energy would accumulate. As I started visualizing that, it began to move faster and faster, eventually entering my body. It was a minuscule amount, like a drop in the ocean, but I was pleased with the result.

Before I could observe the energy, it immediately split into ten parts, and the same phenomenon occurred as it did that day with my father. This time, the process was even faster.

I was left with a pitiful amount of energy within me. I immediately tried to move it to my hand, but no matter what I did, I couldn’t control it. After some time, it dissipated into the atmosphere. I felt as though none of my questions were answered.

After some reflection, I realized that wasn’t entirely true. I did get some questions answered, which gave me confidence that I could eventually find answers to the other questions that had arisen.

First of all, I now know where that energy comes from. It’s all around me—in the earth, air, and even the water I drink. We absorb this energy from the atmosphere into our bodies and can manipulate it like my father did. But why can’t I do it? It’s like I can see the chopsticks but can’t use them efficiently.

Next, I tried to find out where the energy goes after it is absorbed into my body. I repeated the process of absorbing energy and tried to follow its path. After hundreds of tries, I finally saw one of the branches, and it was a shock that nearly blacked out my mind.

I concentrated on the most concentrated part of the energy, which gets absorbed into my lower abdomen. It felt easier to follow than the other eight. Initially, I couldn’t follow it, but after repeated tries, I finally traced it to a silvery-gold metal ball absorbing the energy. I stared at it, dumbfounded, before regaining my senses. That was LILY. There’s no mistake. It was really LILY.

LILY, my AI assistance system from my world, created from an element I invented. How? Why is it inside me? Why is it absorbing energy? I absorbed more energy into my body and followed it to confirm. As I observed LILY, something happened. After absorbing that part of the energy, the ball began to glow and slowly melted, shrinking a bit. I nearly went crazy watching it. Tons of questions popped into my head, and I couldn’t find suitable answers.

It took a long time before I calmed down. As one question was answered, it gave rise to a new set of questions. I decided to wait and slowly try to understand the situation. I postponed further analysis, feeling that conventional methods wouldn’t suffice. There was too much missing information to make sense of it all.

So first, I need to get my hands on a source of information. If I want to do that, I need to move. Yes, starting tomorrow, I’ll focus on moving my body around. As long as I can walk, I can learn more about this world.

*****Almost 6 Months Later******

I am currently sitting on my mother’s lap, listening to her read a book. I discovered that while my mind translates the sounds, I can’t read the text. So, I’m trying to learn the language first.

Initially, I tried to read, thinking that whatever was translating the language would also work on written words. I was wrong. So I started asking the maids, who are always around me, to read, but even they don’t understand all the words. Hmmm… is the literacy rate that low in this world? Check on the List of Investigation…

The language is somewhat similar to the Chinese dialect from my world, with some twists and turns. Since I could almost speak all the languages on Earth, it took me little time to master. Now, I can talk with my mother almost normally. It seems that even though my mind has the knowledge, my body hasn’t grown enough to utilize it freely.

No problem… If I want to talk, I can do that in time. For now, since I have a nearly complete grasp of the language, I can read the books in the library to understand my current situation.

I started looking up books in the library at my home for information about this world. After almost a year of waiting, I can now gather data to answer some of my questions.

First, I need to research the history of this world. Understanding that will provide basic knowledge about its workings and intricacies. Hmmmm… Let’s see… Ah, here it is: “Complete History of Shandra.” This book seems to contain important information, and that’s what I need most right now…

I took down the book and started reading. It seems the world I’m currently in is called “Shandra,” which contains three very large continents, with most of the world covered by a vast ocean. The continents have never been fully explored; humans have covered only about 40% of the total area.

The continent I’m on is called the “Soaring Dragon” continent. It is said that dragons once ruled this part of the world before they were nearly eradicated in a war between different species almost 10,000 years ago.

I gaped in shock when I read that part. Dragons, you say? Those mythical beings exist in this world? And they were almost eradicated? How? Who could do that? Doesn’t this mean there are beings stronger than dragons? WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THIS WORLD??? I felt like banging my head against the wall… Fuuuu… Calm down, Johnny…

Anyway, continuing, the continent is divided into four parts by a mountain range that forms an “X” shape. The Snow City, where I am currently located, is part of the Northern Plains ruled by His Majesty, The Emperor. It seems my father is the Mayor of this city.

Hmm… That is somewhat reassuring. Why? Because if your father is an important figure, you can move around with more freedom without unwanted questions. Even if someone dares to ask, you can intimidate them with your father’s position…

Moving on, it seems this world relies on what they call “Spiritual Energy Cultivation” instead of science and technology. So that energy I felt is called Spiritual Energy, huh? The book describes the levels and basic information in detail. I digested the information and tried to match it with what I have felt and seen over the past year. I have a rough idea of my current condition, but… There is one question that has been on my mind ever since I gained consciousness…

WHY DID I END UP HERE? WHAT HAPPENED AFTER THAT EXPERIMENT? And the one who can provide the answers is currently sleeping within me. A sense of hopelessness enveloped me. It felt like I had no energy left to move forward. But I can’t give up now. First, I need to wake up LILY. For that, I need to provide her with energy, but how much does she need to wake up? I can only absorb energy and hope she wakes up soon. And I need to decide what to do in this world. I have a hunch that I can’t return to my original world, so I must chart my path here. Since I’ve been given a fresh start, let’s explore this new world that’s so different from what I know… Let’s see what challenges this world will throw at me… Yes, whatever happens, I am a scientist… and how many will face a situation like mine??? Let’s make the most of it…